Nudge creates clear boundaries with your child to foster a healthier parent-child relationship. Right now, this dynamic may be familiar to you: your child whines and begs for more screen time, promising to finish their homework or clean their room later, only to disappoint you when the time comes. Despite your best efforts to motivate and encourage them, you find yourself yelling and nagging, feeling drained and frustrated as the cycle repeats itself.

Creating these clear boundaries starts with the Golden Rule:

One Task, One Prompt

The Golden Rule is simple but effective. So why does it work? It works by setting clear boundaries with your child and teaches your child that complaining, whining, or crying to get their way will no longer work. It helps you shift the parent-child dynamic away from being the fun police or the “bad cop.”

To reinforce the Golden Rule, you can tell your child, “You can do XYZ after you’ve completed your tasks and earned the points.” Not only relinquishes you of your role as the fun police but it also gives your child more control over their lives. As your child becomes acclimated, this new dynamic becomes empowering and helps build up their self -confidence and self-esteem. They will also take more initiative in completing their personal responsibilities because they understand that to get the rewards that they want, they must earn the points.

As a result, you are no longer nagging or yelling at your child to get dressed in the morning, to put their toys away, or to get started on homework because they will build an internal sense of purpose that guides them. These negative interactions will make room for meaningful and positive interactions between you and your child.

However, for this to work you must not randomly reward your child with unearned treats and privileges outside of the Nudge system. In “Why you should only reward your child through Nudge,” we will discuss why this is important and a key to success.